BACKDOOR - "We seem to be made to suffer. It's our lot in life."

Altered Beast

1988, Sega, Genesis

HARDCORE - Happy Bear Love!

Aliens vs. Predator

1993, Activision, SNES

ORAL - Whoever wins, we lose!

America's Army

2002, U.S. Army, PC

SELF_LOVE - It is very lonely in the military, yes?

ORAL - OMFG WEAPON OF MASS DESTRUCTION!!1

Asheron's Call 2

2002, Microsoft Game Studios, PC

BESTIALITY - "That would be a Warath butt raping an Armoredillo." -T. Russell

SELF LOVE - Lady, I know your team win the game, but wait until you gets home??

Batman

1989, Sunsoft, NES

AMATEUR - The dark knight return... the favor!

Bloodstorm

1994, Strata, Arcade

AMATEUR - Oh my lord, this is not supposed to be porno game? Mortal Cumbat?

Beavis and Butthead

1994, Viacom, SNES

BACKDOOR - Uh heh heh heh who is the Butthead now?

Beyond Oasis

1994, Sega, Megadrive

ORAL - Word of advice: forest trolls do not take NO for an answer!

Bloody Roar 2

1999, Hudson, Playstation

PANTY - Ooh yeah, bug-man, you go ahead and take a sniff. It's all the good.

Burgertime

1985, Namco, NES

ORAL - Weiner. Buns. The joke is just too serious.

ORAL - Robot pr0n is the hottest! Beep! Beep!

Counter-Strike

2000, Sierra, PC

ORAL - This is the war on terrorism?

Counter-Strike: Source

2004, Valve, PC

BACKDOOR - The bomb of my loins has been defused, SIR!!

BESTIALITY - Wow, this hunter really getting his "trophy"!!

Delta Force

1998, Novalogic, PC

BACKDOOR - A test: ask a soldier to sit on his gun and see which end he sits on.

Demon's Crest

1994, Capcom, SNES

AMATEUR - Even in the land of demons this is quite dirty I assure you.

Dig Dug

1982, Namco/Atari, Arcade

AMATEUR - Oh yeah, Dig Dug! You pumped him up good, man.

Doom 3

2004, id software, PC

ZOMBIE SEX - "It too dark! I can't see whose ass that I'm squeezing!"

ORAL - Super Turbo Turkey Puncher HI SCORE coming right up!!!

ZOMBIE SEX - Fat one on top? Not right, dude!

ZOMBIE SEX - Oh, it so big it split his head open!!

ZOMBIE SEX - Look out behind you!

Donkey Kong Country

1994, Rare, SNES

GANGBANG - Ah, the famous rhinocerous underwater love helmet!

Double Dragon II: The Revenge

1988, Acclaim, NES

GANGBANG - This worse than the night Abobo drank a bathtub full of tequila...

Dragon Ball Z - Hyper Dimension

1996, Bandai, SNES

ORAL - Oh nice - a Super Saiyan blowjob!

Dragon Ball Z: Supersonic Warriors

2004, Bandai, SNES

BACKDOOR - AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Dragon Warrior

1989, Enix, NES

HARDCORE - Hey, you two! Get a room at the Inn! Oh, wait...

Drakan: The Ancient Gates

2002, SCEA, PC

BESTIALITY - Oh ho, Mr. Beast! Welcome to my Ancient Gate!

AMATEUR - And in the middle of the jungle, love was discovered...

Felix the Cat

1992, Hudson, NES

BESTIALITY - Felix the Cat does best Richard Gere impression. AND LOOK AT MR. TREE.

Final Fantasy V

1992, Square, SNES

BESTIALITY - I have no comment on this image at this time.

Final Fantasy XI Online

2003, Square, PC

HOT FLASH - I don't know who made this, but it's ultra-sexy! Good music!

Final Fight

1989, Capcom, Arcade

AMATEUR - Don't ever tell me you never get any of the foreplay, beeotch!!!

AMATEUR - "OOG OOOG URRAAAAAGGGGHHHH!!!"

Golgo 13

1988, Victokai Inc. / Saito Productions, NES

AMATEUR - Shaken, not stirred.

Gothic 2

2002, Piranha Bytes, PC

BESTIALITY - Oh, poor sheep... forced to suck in the tall grass!

Ghosts n' Goblins

1985, Capcom, NES

AMATEUR - What, you act as though you've never seen a knight's helmet before.

AMATEUR - Come and gets it, zombies!!!

BESTIALITY - Japanese call it HENTAI! Everyone else just call it backdoor demon sex.

Grand Theft Auto: Vice City

2003, Rockstar Games, Xbox/PS2/PC

ORAL - What is it with kids and their slang these days?

SELF LOVE - This is why the Havoc Physics Engine created. Dynamic Gameplay!

Harvest Moon

1997, Natsume, Inc., SNES

BESTIALITY - Yeah, you know how he like it? RUFF! "HA HA HA"

Hitman

2000, Eidos Interactive, PC

PLANT SEX - Oh no, Mother Nature no!

Horizons: Empire of Istaria

2003, Artifact Entertainment, PC

ORAL - Golden Dragon, such majestic creature. Green Dragon, pretty good blowjob.

BACKDOOR - Oh, you said backcourt. It is my bad, WNBA player.

Jedi Knight 2

2002, Raven Interactive, PC

AMATEUR - Oh yes, I can feel the force that is very strong in this one!

AMATEUR - Hm, even my force pull can't get my watch back out...

ORAL - How do you explain why mission fail this time?

Justice League Task Force

1995, Acclaim, SNES

HARDCORE - Watch out, she wear condom out of Kryponite!

HARDCORE - ROWWWRRR!! HISS!!!

AMATEUR - THESE TITS... BELONG TO AQUAMAN!!!

BESTIALITY - Oh Wolfie you are so good, but too much fang!

Kirby's Dreamland 3

1997, Nintendo, SNES

GANGBANG - Ohhhhhh MY GOD.

Knights of the Round

1992, Capcom, SNES

BESTIALITY - Oh, tiger seems ready to burst. That must be why he's so mad.

Knuckle Bash

1993, Toaplan, Arcade

AMATEUR - The only thing I can say is LOOK AT THOSE PANTS.

Kung Fu

1984, Irem, NES

ORAL - Hey! Where does the line start??

ORAL - Chicken says it the best!

Legend of the Mystical Ninja

1991, Konami, SNES

MODEL - Oh Dad, you're always such a show-off at the carnival!

Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past

1991, Nintendo, SNES

HARDCORE - This is a sin I think... right?

Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time

1998, Nintendo, N64

SELF LOVE - This is what happen when you live in a windmill your whole life.

Lineage 2

2004, NCSoft, PC

HARDCORE - Oh noes I invoke +20 Fist of Stinky for +50 Elfish Orgazm!!!

Lunar, Silver Star Story

1998, GameArts/Working Designs, Sega CD

SELF LOVE - More chickens? I'm confused, yet still strangely erotic!

HARDCORE - And the "very ethnically diverse crowd" is stunned!

Marvel Super Heroes vs. Street Fighter

1998, Capcom, Arcade

AMATEUR - YEEEAAAAIIIII FINAL ATOMIC BUSTER HANDJOB

Mario vs. Donkey Kong

2004, Nintendo, GBA

AMATEUR - Mario, that key for door not your DICK!?

Max Payne 2: The Fall of Max Payne

2003, Remedy, PC

AMATEUR - Awwwww, so romantic! This one is for the ladies!

HARDCORE - Wait? Max Payne or Max Hardcore? I must know!

Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty

2001, Konami, Playstation 2

HOT VIDEO - Jungle Boogie! Snake Eater! Wa-hoo!

Michael Jackson's Moonwalker

1990, Sega, Arcade

ORAL - Okay, now we know who is bad...

Michael Jackson's Moonwalker

1990, Sega, Megadrive

ORAL - Michael, I believed in you!

Mighty Final Fight

1993, Capcom, NES

ORAL - Oh, such sweet kisses for Haggar. Mwa mwa!

Morrowind

2003, Bethesda Softworks, PC

TRANNY SURPRISE - Wow... she bigger than me. So hot!

Mortal Kombat 4

1997, Midway, Arcade

ORAL - Oh, this is simply beautiful. Quite a work of art. But I hope he can breathe!

HANDJOB - That is cool! And by cool, I mean totally sweet!

ORAL - Oh yeah, the yellow Pac eats a huge power pellet! Geez...

Pengo

1982, Sega, Arcade

HARDCORE - What? Two butternuts in romantic entanglement? I don't understand.

Pitfall

1982, Activision, Atari 2600

ORAL - Pitfall Harry get very lonely in the jungle. Only snakes around!

Pitstop 2

1984, Epyx, Apple II

BACKDOOR - Pretty nice pit stop, don't you think? OH NO, he missed the car!!

Planetside

2004, Sony Online Entertainment, PC

BACKDOOR - What Planet is this? Sore Moon of Saturn?

Priston Tale

2004, Priston Game Development, PC

ORAL - Oh, little girl, you look too young for this! Video games are corrupting!

SELF LOVE - Oh, my poor friend, you are so pale. I must revive you beneath a tree.

Real Bout Fatal Fury

1995, SNK, Neo Geo

AMATEUR - OH THE FORCE OF YOUR VAGINA IS POWERFUL

Red Faction II

2002, Volition, Xbox

GAY EROTICA - This is not sexy, but romantic. A little is okay. How sweet!

Ren and Stimpy Show, The

1993, THQ, NES

BACKDOOR - Better than bad, so it must be good I think.

Ring King

1987, Data East, NES

ORAL - This is the original! This is the best! Can you taste the victory?

River City Ransom

1989, Technos, NES

SEX TOY - Hey lady, you dropped something...

ORAL - BARF

AMATEUR - Oh no, that embarrassing - she need telescope!

The Sims 2

2004, Electronic Arts, PC

AMATEUR - Will Wright, you are a sick little monkey who need spanking!!

Star Wars Galaxies

2003, LucasArts, PC

ORAL - "I find your use of teeth disturbing."

HANDJOB - Stay on target... stay on target...

Super Double Dragon

1992, Tradewest, SNES

ORAL - Wow, long line for a desperate blowjob!

Super Smash Bros.

1999, Nintendo, N64

SELF LOVE - Stone Cold FOX.

Super Smash Bros. Melee

2001, Nintendo, Gamecube

HARDCORE - HAHAHA look at Fox's expression in this one!

GANGBANG - PIKACHU, I CHOOSE... you?

ORAL - Pikachu again?!

ORAL - Uh, the princess must be hiding some fruit in there...

HARDCORE - Princess again?! Why are you such the prostitute!

ORAL - Pikachu, wtf dude!

BACKDOOR - PIKACHU, YOU BIGGEST SLUT OF ALL TIME!!!

Super Street Fighter

1994, Capcom, Arcade

ORAL - Oh, Cammy, you are truly one of the hottest!

ORAL - Wow, she really taking back the night!

Splatterhouse 2

1992, Namco, Megadrive

ZOMBIE SEX - Who sent this?! You're a sick man. But there's the splatter, I see.

Streets of Rage

1991, Sega, Megadrive

BACKDOOR - Oooh, Adam baby, why you bein' so rough with me tonight?!

Sumo Wrestling

1993, Kodansha, Megadrive

HARDCORE - Ah, the ancient art of sumo. Who says fat Japanese men are not sexy?

Super Mario Bros. 3

1988, Nintendo, NES

PLANT SEX - It only hurt for the first eight hour. Then it's aaaaall the good, man.

Super Mario World

1990, Nintendo, SNES

BESTIALITY - How often do Italian plumber make love to dinosaur in a big keyhole?

SWAT 3

2000, Sierra, PC

HARDCORE - TAKE IT EASY MAN, HE'S BLEEDING!!!

BACKDOOR - SWAT discovers the horrible secret behind the special sauce...

HARDCORE - Oh wow, Octopus Hold! Not much more hardcore than that...

BACKDOOR - Squat Squat Squat

SELF LOVE - All guys wish they could do this.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 3

1992, Konami, NES

BACKDOOR - These are the turtles in a half shell? I want to be in that shell as well.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Tournament Fighters

2001, UbiSoft, PC

ORAL - Oh, this is too much Turtle Power, I think. Ouch.

Tekken 4

2002, Namco, PS2

ORAL - HEIHACHI VIAGRA!!!

Tiny Toon Adventures

1991, Konami, NES

BACKDOOR - Most Appropriate Caption Award Winner

Tom Clancy's Ghost Recon

2001, UbiSoft, PC

SELF LOVE - Word of advice: stop when it bleeds!

Tom Clancy's Rainbow 6

2000, RedStorm Entertainment, PC

AMATEUR - Now I know where "Rainbow" come from...

True Crime: Streets of LA

2003, Activision, PS2

ORAL - It's true. I been to LA, and they wear girls on their faces there.

Two Crude Dudes

1992, Data East, Megadrive

BACKDOOR - Now this is exactly why they call them the Two Crude Dudes.

ZOMBIE SEX - HA HA HA, they LOVE it!

AMATEUR - It like... it like... that movie with Tom Hanks and volleyball?

BACKDOOR - NOOOOO BARNEY PUT THE CHILDREN DOWN

Wild Arms 2nd Ignition

2000, SCEI, Playstation

AMATEUR - Perhaps she has not also heard of my "Wild Wang"...

World Heroes Perfect

1995, SNK/ADK, Neo-Geo

ORAL - Don't touch, your hand too cold!

ORAL - Hey, baby... ENTER THE DRAGON

World of Warcraft

2004, Blizzard, PC

ORAL - WOW, what a PIMP!!

AMATEUR - I thought this cute. "What are you thinking about, honey?"

World War 2 Online

2000, Cornered Rat Software, PC

BESTIALITY - Those French prostitutes certainly are furry.

WWF No Mercy

2000, THQ, N64

ORAL - Mr. Wrestler, don't take the signs seriously!!

BACKDOOR - Jon Perry told me he thinks Psylocke is the hottest X-Man.

HARDCORE - Oh no no no, this is wrong. This is a kid's game - not good.

Ys 3: Wanderers From Ys

1991, American Sammy, SNES

SELF LOVE - DOGI, you are certainly not kidding.

"where you can have your last image in the 'Punch-out' game??? I have this game and I never see this image before. Please get me an awser." [Note: I did not say this peoples, some other baka did!]

Contributors

adam, Akira (awesome dude), A-kun, aL Mccali, anarcade_vet, anthex, APR, Ben, BEN EVERETT, Carrion Reek, Chase AKA Timmy, Cheese Dolphin, Clint Carr, David De Bels, Demon Xanth, Dirk Monson, Doggone, Douglas Winslow, Dr. Trunks, Ecclesia, Elizabeth Nguyen, Emanuele Lo-Presti, Eric Hartman, Erik Brännström, General Kruge, Giiizmo, Gustav (oh baby), GURUTAGO, Happypeepeehead, Hunter, Javier Pante Pérez, jawser, João Salvio, John, John Thorn, Johan & Tore, Johnny H, Jonathan Evans, Jonathan Fogg, Josh free, jozefa gawel, Justin, Kamidake Evil, Kappa (Satan), k g, Lacquerhead, Loren Armitage (big contributor!!!), maRKUs, Mário aka UoBtEx_FODA, Matt White, Morbo, Mike F, Mike Snyder, Mikko Torniainen, Mir4dawin, Motorhed (a sexy beard), mukor keletappi, Nate, NeoStarr, Nicholas Burman, Nitro, nN, Phil, raincoatduck <3, Robert Freeman, Robert Lantry, Rob Veldt, Rob Bloom, Ron, Rubb|sh, Sean Stuart, Shawn Feezer, SinSlave, Tate Russell, Taylor, The Dude, Todd, Trey Pleasant, Tryggve Sollid (.Y.), Úlairë Enquëa, Urias Nooteboom, Vindic@tor, Zork (a white building?), with special thanks to your mom